Ahhh, Valentine’s Day. It’s considered the most romantic day of the year, but if you and your significant other are dealing with infertility, it may be harder to get in the mood. Let cupid’s arrow strike and turn this Valentine’s Day into a day of hope, health and happiness.
Here are a few suggestions for you and your loved one on Valentine’s Day (or any other day for that matter) on ways to keep your relationship healthy:
1. Schedule a non-fertility date. On this date, neither of you are allowed to talk about children, infertility, medical treatments or anything to do with what you’re going through. Consider going to dinner and a movie; or, cook a dinner for two and decorate the room with heart-shaped candles.
2. Bring spontaneity back into sex. What about making reservations at a hotel for this Valentine’s Day? But remember not to discuss fertility before, during or after! The key to this is to make it so spontaneous and fun that you banish the work that sex has become. A simple “I Love You” with a kiss can set the mood.
3. Communicate the positive. Try putting limits on the time you talk about infertility so that it does not overtake all of your communication. Reassure your partner that you are both in it together. Tell your loved one how you feel about them and why you want to have a child together.
4. Keep a sense of humor. No matter how tough things get, being able to find something humorous about the situation helps to relieve tension. Laughing together is good for the health of your relationship.
5. Consider getting professional insight. Even if you think your relationship will weather the infertility storm, it’s still a good idea to consider talking to a couples therapist or joining a support group for people going through infertility treatments.
For more information:
· RESOLVE – www.resolve.org
· American Society for Reproductive Medicine - www.asrm.org